ST. GEORGE — As stalking cases rise along with Southern Utah’s growth, advocates explain signs you should watch out for and what to do.

Alissa Urzi, who works as a victim services coordinator for the St. George Police Department, told St. George News that people need to listen to their gut instincts if they feel they may be in a stalking situation, especially considering that some of the perpetrators could be strangers. 

“It (being stalked by a stranger) can be just as traumatizing — if not more — because you don’t know the animal like you would if it was your intimate partner,” Urzi said. “Just over 80% of women are stalked by a former or current intimate partner, so that leaves about 20% of people who strangers stalk.”

January is Stalking Awareness Month, “an annual call to action to recognize and respond to the serious crime of stalking,” according to the Stalking Prevention, Awareness and Resource Center (SPARC) website.

Urzi said the term stalking means engaging in a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to care for their safety or suffer substantial emotional distress. Urzi added to watch for patterns of two or more events. 

Stalking behavior occurs when someone:

• follows you.
• waits outside of your home, school, workplace or gym.
• visits places that you often go to spy on you. 
• attempts to get into your home or your workplace.
• sends messages and follows you constantly on social media.
• places a tracker on your vehicle.
• gives unwanted cards, letters, flowers or presents. 
• makes unwanted phone calls, including hang-ups and voice messages

“If you feel like you’re being stalked and someone’s behavior makes you uncomfortable, I would encourage you to call victim services at the police department of your town,” Urzi said. “We take stalking extremely seriously.”

The types of stalking have changed over the years and the number of events has grown as Southern Utah’s population has increased. 

“There are so many different ways to stalk people now compared to 20 years ago, with social media and tracking devices, that sort of thing,” Urzi said. “I hardly ever hear of people leaving roses on the doorstep any more. They’re much more creative now.”

But she said tracking the behavior of someone stalking you is more accessible when “you can grab a screenshot.”

Urzi advises that if someone thinks they are being stalked or harassed, they should gather as much evidence as possible, like photos and videos. She said it’s vital to keep a log and history of the events.

One of the ways to combat stalking behavior is to set clear boundaries with the person in question. You can also change your routine, route and phone number, as well as put up cameras both inside and outside your home and contact law enforcement. 

When contacting law enforcement, a victim doesn’t always have to file a protective order in the beginning unless they want to, Urzi said, adding that a person can file a stalking injunction first. This gives the law officers the teeth needed to stop what would be usually considered normal behavior.

For example, if someone is knocking on your door and you call 911, usually the police would respond that knocking on the door is not illegal. But if you already have a stalking injunction, law enforcement can act.

Urzi shared a situation of a female being stalked by a former intimate partner. He was coming to her work, trying to get her fired. He was blasting her name all over social media. So, the female kept a log of what was happening and obtained the stalking injunction that stopped him. The man was ordered to stop going to her work, her apartment and from mentioning her on social media platforms.

Another resource in Southern Utah is the Dove Center, which is more than a safe house. Madonna Melton, operations and shelter director, told St. George News they have staff members who assist with stalking, dating or domestic violence and sexual abuse. 

“The Dove Center deals with the most common type of stalking called simple obsession,” Melton said. “The stalker is usually male, and the focus of stalking is an ex-wife or ex-lover, but it could also be a co-worker.”

Stalkers are typically from intimate partner relationships and they frequently start right before the breakup. Melton said the Dove Center will have clients who call when they’re getting ready to end the relationship. Their partner thinks they’re cheating, so they follow them around. The Dove Center assists both men and women over the age of 18. 

“The stalker is usually male, but we deal with both male and female victims,” Melton said. “Sometimes, I wonder if there are more male victims. Male victims often tend not to call it in.”

The Dove Center also assists those who need to flee a situation or have an emergency. Additionally, the organization has an outreach center where those who don’t need emergency shelter can call and get help with case management. 

“Oftentimes, those who are in trauma don’t even know what the first step is. People don’t even know how to even begin,” Melton said. 

Sixteen domestic violence shelters in the state of Utah are independently operated. Melton said there is a “sisterhood” among them where they discuss situations and help each other with ideas on how to deal with those circumstances. 

Utah Tech University also offers support and services to victims. The university police department victim advocate is a vital resource in these cases as they can assist the victim seeking a stalking injunction or protective order and with court procedures. 

Utah Tech Interim Chief Wes LiCalzi told St. George News that his department supports students and visitors. The office will follow up with the victim for additional resources or assistance. Officers can provide police escorts around campus. The department also gives presentations to all incoming freshmen and their parents about the victim advocate services and available resources. 

LiCalzi added that officers work quickly to investigate after they get a report. They use several resources in investigations and provide them to the victim. 

“I think it’s great to bring the awareness so that people can have that kind of sixth sense of wait; something’s a little off here,” LiCalzi said. “At first, it can even appear to be complimentary and you can be kind of proud that someone’s paying you that much attention. However, if you get to know the signs of ‘Are they getting too involved in my life? Do they want to know my every move? Do they want to follow me around? Do they want to know all my social media, what I’m doing?”

LiCalzi said it’s important to share your concerns with others and not worry about being polite if there are red flags.

“Let people know. It may be embarrassing at the time, but you gotta let people know,” LiCalzi said. “It’s in our nature to be polite, especially in the community that we live in, to be polite to people and not necessarily create distance. But when you recognize those signs, it’s very important that you want to stop communication.”

LiCalzi said while social media helps connect people, there’s also a sinister side to it: social media can make it easier for stalkers. He advises that people know who they’re connected to and turn off any features on all social media apps that could compromise their privacy. 

“Don’t blanketly open up your Snapchat or anything like that to show where you’re at all times because you never know in this day and age who has that information and what they’re going to do with it,” LiCalzi said. 

According to the Stalking Awareness organization’s website, stalking impacts 1 in 3 women and 1 in 6 men in the United States. The site states that stalking is a public health problem experienced by both women and men. “It typically includes being followed, spied upon, repeatedly contacted and often threats of violence. It can even lead to homicide in severe cases.”

Some of the resources the website offers victims or survivors of stalking visit the “What to Do if You are Being Stalked” page. If you are a stalking victim in need of help you may also VictimConnect, DV Hotline, or RAINN.

Copyright St. George News, SaintGeorgeUtah.com LLC, 2024, all rights reserved.