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ST. GEORGE — Nearly three weeks after the search for a missing Dammeron Valley man ended with the discovery that he had taken his own life, his mother is still grieving. But there is another word that would describe the feelings Spring Dykstrahas right now.
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Gratitude.
Dykstra is still dealing with the sorrow from the five-day search for her missing 28-year-old son Tanner Marvel, a resident of Dammeron Valley, died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound. His body was found on a dirt road off Old Dixie Highway 91 near Santa Clara on April 26.
But as someone from out of state, she said she also is filled with the warmth of all the help she received from the Southern Utah people who wanted only to help and nothing in return.
Dyststra said this includes everyone from the man who used his private helicopter to help search for Tanner to the complete strangers who generously rushed to help.
“I mean, a majority of the people that I ended up dealing with while I was down there, you know, never met before in my life,” Dykstra, of Carson City, Nev., said. “I can’t imagine having gone through this anywhere else, other than St. George, because I don’t know if I would like to think that the reception would have been the same. But everybody down there, whether it was employees at Walmart or people working at Snow Canyon park, I mean, just everywhere, just across the board, it was incredible.”
When she mentioned to the staff of the Quality inn on Bluff Street her circumstances, they discounted a large portion of the bill. Search crews from Washington and Kane counties as well as volunteers from the St. George Catholic Church aided in the search. James Riordan of Pioneer Aviation made a helicopter available. And particular individuals like Jeremy Johnson, C.J. Wade, Ryan Anderson and Roger and Kris Larson were instrumental, Dykstra noted.
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“While some people and entities didn’t physically aid in the search for and recovery of my son’s body, they aided in pure, unconditional support and positive thoughts and prayers,” Dykstra said.
May is National Mental Health Awareness month and campaigns like Live On Utah are trying to remove the stigma from those dealing with such issues and give them and their families tools for help.
Dykstra said she and her family didn’t necessarily catch on to her son’s struggles but now see them in retrospect — signs of accomplishment thrown away both emotionally and physically that would be important to others, but are treated like garbage.
“There were some telltale signs, but we realized what they were after the fact. The biggest, main thing I can say is pay attention to thos individual surroundings, as far as like personal habits, things that change that seem completely out of character for them,” Dykstra said. “Just pay attention and something that seems like nothing is better if you explore it, than if you don’t and end up in a situation like what we were in.”
Resources
If you or someone you know is in danger because of suicidal thoughts or actions, call 911 immediately. Suicide is an emergency that requires help by trained medical professionals and always should be treated seriously.
Nationwide suicide hotlines, 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) and 1-800-273-TALK (8255), have counselors available 24/7. The Southwest Behavioral Health Center also offers help for Southern Utah residents; call 800-574-6763 or 435-634-5600.
Other resources include Suicide.org, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and the American Association of Suicidology. All provide comprehensive information and help on the issue of suicide, from prevention to treatment to coping with loss.
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